Hey there readers, we’re going to do this a bit differently. Instead of combining our thoughts into one, this review will still be a joint one except with separate thoughts. It’s a bit long but have fun and take 5-10 minutes to read.

{Bi~ΟΠ~iC}

After 1.5 years of hearing about Christina Aguilera’s next album and that month or two of thinking iamwhoiamami was her epic return, we finally got to hear the first offering in April. Briefly following the release of “Not Myself Tonight” the GaGa comparisons seemed endless but we remained neutral until we heard the album. After listening to Bionic we can assure everyone that this is all Christina Aguilera, experimenting of course, and even seeing and hearing a return to her dirrrty style.

Bionic

S: This bass bumping track was a perfect way to start off the album. This song is definitely something to just ease the seat back in your car and just groove to if you’re feeling a bit cocky… why not?
C: Couldn’t agree more, the John Hill & Switch production is THAT Santigold magic.

Not Myself Tonight

S: The first single of the album! It’s a great little ditty production by Polow Da Don and co-written by Ester Dean that has you okay with doing things you normally wouldn’t do. *Dirrty Alert*
C: When this song first leaked it had me hyped then after the hype, reality set in and I realized what was supposed to be a more alternative album quickly became mainstream fodder for the masses. N.M.T. is a hot but completely forgettable song.

Woohoo feat. Nicki Minaj

S: Who knew Nicki and Christina would have such good chemistry. The beat is fantastically made for all you booty poppers out there. It’s a fun sounding track equipped with hand clapping and the strategically place woohoo’s. *An album fave*
C: Really S, the track is tight but no way would I say this is the album’s shining light. I’m still mad that she resorted to Nicki Minaj. The song is good but at the same time they pulled a forced collab a la Beyoncé y Lady GaGa.

Elastic Love

S: This one begins with some electro farting and is reminiscent of M.I.A.’s Kala album. This is not something we expected but it’s a good track nonetheless.
C: Cut, hands down, this the album’s BEST uptempo track. Aguilera has a style so sexy on this track and here again John Hill & Switch knocks the matter of the park on the production end, BRAVO!

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Desnudate

S: We’re pretty sure that is not a Spanish word, naughty Christina strikes again! This is a latin fire song. At one point you can almost see a crowd of people salsa-ing in the street.
C: Desnudate, is not a proper Spanish word but it has a lot of sexual meaning and sexuality runs throughout this song from opening second to closing. This is one of the weaker songs on the album, but still quite decent. *correction* Desnudate is a conjugated form of the verb desnudar which means to undress.

Love and Glamour (Intro)

S: Just a snippet of words from Christina “ Fashion is a lifestyle, it’s a choice… You have to live it, you have to love it , you have to believe it.”
C: Pardon my personal infatuation with Christina Aguilera’s speaking voice but its incredibly sexy.

Glam

S: Three words for this song: You. Betta. Work. *Vogues*
C: [Laughs] How did I know you were going there? This is a proper ode to Madonna’s “Vogue” without being a copycat. Uhh question, for what reason was “Not Myself Tonight” chosen over this as lead single?

Prima Donna feat. Lil Jon

S: This is another bass bumper! This time around she brings hype man Lil John to kick this track in crazy mode. This song reeks swag and heat. *coughpossiblenextsinglecough???*
C: Been reading all over the forums and a great deal of other people want this as the next single as well. The song is fun to listen to and with Lil Jon as hype man its perfect for when you want to build energy. Just to be difficult, if this is released as the next single it will further give uninformed people the impression that Aguilera is trying to imitate, which is “CLEARLY” not the case.

Morning Dessert (Intro)

S: Sexy as hell interlude.
C: No difference of opinion here, “Sexy as hell interlude.” Sounds like that grown 90’s R&B with a slight twist.

Sex for Breakfast

S: This is the beginning of harmonic smooth beats of lyrics. It’s gotta be on that “baby-making” list.
C: Now this is a slow jam, a bit too mature for my tastes but I can appreciate its depth and the passion and emotions it can bring about in the listener.

Lift Me Up

S: I like this song not only because she sung it at the Hope for Haiti benefit concert but because it is just a beautiful ballad. It’s loaded with emotions and sung beautifully.
C: Beautiful (no pun intended), Aguilera puts that once in a lifetime voice on display to silence everyone. Aguilera is taking us to heaven and beyond from 2:47 – 3:20.

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My Heart (Intro)

S: Interlude of her Husband Jordan and son Max.
C: So precious… such an ideal family.

All I Need

S: This is probably one of those songs you grow to love on an album. It doesn’t strike you when you first listen to it. It is rather boring and makes you want to click next.
C: Going to have to disagree with you S, this is some Easy Listening comfort material.

I Am

S: I do not feel the need to reiterate the previous review.
C: I’m going to have to disagree because this song, like “Lift Me Up,” is flawless. Her vocals are smooth as whipped cream and you know I’m a sucker for strings.

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You Lost Me

S: Now this is another slow song but not as boring as the previous two. This is likable, it shows the gracefulness of her vocals with a mythical feel to it.
C: This is the most promoted ballad on the album thus far. It is absolutely moody and warm, Aguilera hits another home run.

I Hate Boys

S: This playful number is okay. Not as hype as earlier tracks. Not a favorite.
C: Personally, this is my least favorite of all the uptempos.

My Girls

S: This track featuring Peaches (whose lyrics are known to be anything but fruity) is unlike what we expected. It wasn’t all that raunchy, its actually a nice “Girls Night Out Kinda Song.”
C: The song had a great outcome but it leaves me wanting more. A collaboration with Peaches had me longing for a “AA XXX” sequel, or something along those lines.

Vanity

S: The first few seconds of this song will have your mouth hanging open. This song is so cocky!! Although the beat isn’t as strong as the other tracks, this song makes up for it in lyrics and vocals. *An album fave*
C: Aguilera lets loose her “bravada.” This is a perfect song for those who have an unnecessary ego confidence.

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BONUS TRACKS

Monday Morning

S: This track with its disco influenced beat is quite the funky one. Definitely a boogie down type song.
C: Agreed, so disco influenced yet so calm.

Bobblehead

S: *Duck walks and suicide drop*
C: [LAUGHS] Here again, how did I know you were going to go there with this song. Yea, you’re not lyin’, very flamboyant but you can tell she had pure fun recording this song.

Birds of Prey

S: This song is another mystical/Indian feeling track but also upbeat which makes it a good candidate for a runway show.
C: Couldn’t agree with you more on this Ladytron produced track. The bonus “Little Dreamer”  was probably not thought of as being as nice as this one [LISTEN HERE].

Stronger Than Ever

S: This is the “Beautiful” of the album.
C: Yea, we can call it the “Beautiful” of this album but the song gives more of a “Fighter” vibe.

I Am (Stripped)

S: This version is 30922832409383% better than the original. The acoustic guitar and piano gives this a Adele type feel. Overall, a good song.
C: Well, you know how much I love the original and this rendition is just as gorgeous.

Conclusion

In the end this album was pretty good. Although it had some song that would be instantly “next-ed.” - S

It’s been a bumpy ride but thankfully Bionic landed on a spot that rubbed me oh so greatly. I definitely think RCA and Christina do not have the slightest clue on how to choose singles because this always happens. If you go by “Not Myself Tonight” you will wrongfully judge this album. The album is incredible and was well worth the 4 year wait. The only complaint is its not as innovative as she made us to believe but she more than made up for it in other areas. In 2-3 years I can still pick up this album and play this as if it came out the week before. - C